Conflict often arises when each person assumes the other’s motives without truly listening. To build empathy and reduce tension, try these three exercises that help you step into your partner’s shoes. First, practice active listening: when your partner speaks, focus solely on their words and body language, avoid planning your rebuttal. After they finish, summarise what you heard: “It sounds like you feel overwhelmed by our expenses because you worry about saving for our child’s future.” This clarifies misunderstandings and shows respect. Second, adopt the “Mirror Technique”: after a disagreement, take a brief pause. Then swap perspectives mentally: imagine how your partner perceives the situation, their emotional triggers, and their underlying needs. Ask yourself: “Why might they feel threatened when I suggest reducing spending? What past experiences influence their reaction?” This mental role-play builds compassion. Third, schedule weekly “Perspective Chats” where each person gets uninterrupted time, two or three minutes, to share their view on a particular topic, whether finances, parenting, or household chores. No interruptions or judgments allowed. After both have spoken, discuss areas of overlap and difference calmly. Over time, these exercises cultivate mutual understanding and reduce knee-jerk reactions. When you consistently show genuine interest in your partner’s viewpoint, verifying rather than assuming, you create a foundation of trust. This doesn’t mean you’ll always agree, but you’ll communicate with greater clarity, compassion, and reduced conflict.

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